Let's try afresh..

Hi Ho, Hi Ho, it's off to chemo we go (it's an early start tomorrow; in for 9:15).

Yay... I am determined that it's going to go off without any blubbing (frankly it ain't a chemo clinic if my face doesn't leak at some point... even when I am usually in on a high-chat-fest with all the nurses I can still manage to squeeze out a few tears (it's a good job they flush me out with saline that's for sure)).

Had the fatigue hit again today. Don't worry this isn't me about to post a "oh woe is me, I am so fatigued" post, as I am still happy, happy sunshine Dawn. But as this is my only record of things through chemo I am going to try to document all the trials and tribulations of a chemo journey.. so it could get tedious when I start talking about my indigestion!!! - apologies.
I did the pre-chemo Morrison's shop today but with one-thing-and-another I was out for over 3 hours in the end (slow chemo brain makes making food decisions very amusing).

Fatigue hit as I was approaching the check out. Fatigue is funny. It's just a word and it is so hard to know what it means as I am sure it encompasses a whole range of feelings. For me I suddenly felt bushed and achy. It became a massive struggle to load up the shopping onto the conveyor and I even put my head down on the trolley handlebars (or whatever you call them) for a tiny seconds shut eye and to take the weight from my lower back that killed. I must have looked ridiculous - but frankly darling, I didn't give a damn. I had to only pack a few jars into each bag so I could lift them into the trolley... and when I got to loading up the car it suddenly dawned on me that I was making audible Wimbledon-tennis-player noises each time I picked a bag into the car!!!! A quick look around showed only a handful of OAP's, so to avoid any confusion that I might just be a weirdo, I whipped off the hat and continued the task bald, safe in the knowledge that I had an excuse :D

I must admit, I readily use the bald head for many occasions. I once needed the loo desperately, so I nipped into a charity shop but they only had a staff loo which they couldn't let me use. Cue the chemo excuse about really needing to go...... have I no shame!!!

Oh, and last night I washed my hair!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I used baby shampoo and got up a lovely lather as opposed to just washing my head. I didn't think I was attached to my hair and took ever so quickly to baldness and was really comfy with it..... but having a fuzz covering is just sooooo exciting, oooh it must be a good few millimeters now ;-D Apologies to everyone who I have made stroke my soft, soft head over the last few days :-D

Right enough babbling. I am going to try for an early night (if the steroids let me). Despite my body being a bit bushed I am feeling quite clear headed and pretty well actually.