At last, my final week!

It's my last week of treatment this week and I am feeling really great about it.

I have found the radiotherapy has flown by so far and after 6 months of slogging through chemotherapy it seems like a walk in the park. I did expect the worst and made lots of contingency plans in case I couldn't cope but I seem to have got through them OK so far (with a little help now and then). The after-affects can continue for some time so I will need to just bear this in mind, but I am definitely on the up-and-up energy wise. Plus, the doc said my breast was doing "beautifully" so far :D

This week is "Boosters"... which means still going to the same place and the same machine, however they attach this contraption-thing that extends down and down until it touches your skin. Then Zap and its over!


A meeting with The Doctor....
Today I have also had a meeting with the Doc that I was supposed to see last week but she wasn't in. It has been a really productive meeting and I am feeling much better about it than after the meeting with the substitute doctor last week.
This time I was at least looked at and checked over when I told her about my aches and pains instead of being dismissed with a "phuh, it's nothing!"[aka don't-waste-my-time paranoid patient!]. It doesn't take much to just at least listen to my worries (be them paranoid or not) and check me over. Ahhh and my mind is at rest (for now ;-D)
I just feel really reassured that I have had a good check over, feel, listen, prod and poke! She is also going to send me for a CT scan and bone scan just to check things over and get a good baseline for future reference. They should happen in the next few weeks.


Also on the agenda was the "To be (treated), or not to be (treated with tamoxifen)" question.
This is really the million-dollar question and I don't have an answer as yet. This doctor seemed to be erring on the side of treatment not being worth it in my case. (I got the impression she didn't think she would put herself through it).

And now for the science....
Essentially, I was tested for hormone receptors by a core-biopsy which came back with a score of 3/8+, however, the score was negative (0/8) on the final lumpectomy pathology.
So, my cancer may or may not be responding weekly to oestrogen hormones. Therefore the benefit to having hormonal treatments could be really small. So, do I take the hormone therapies which are not without side effects and risks themselves (but doesn't every pill you pop); Tamoxifen can give rise to general menopausal side effects and can in rare cases increase the risk of blood clots and womb cancer. Zoladex is supposed to be temporary and so I should get my fertility (what's left of it hopefully, fingers crossed, touch wood etc etc.) back afterwards but still it is a drug affecting my ovaries and that might not always be the case. So can you tell my mind is a little bit swamped by this decision he he....

I must admit, it is very appealing to not have to have any more treatments and to be a "patient" no longer. This will be a subject James and I will be ruminating over during the next few weeks. I am going back to the oncologist on the 14th Aug to further discuss this with her too. But although it is a decision that needs to be made I don't feel too daunted or shook up by having to make it at the moment.

So for now let's just get these boosters over and done with!

A little bit of Bananarama...

Only you can set me free,
'Cos I'm guilty,
Guilty as a girl can be,
Come on baby can't you see,
I stand accuuuuuuuuuuused of love in the first degree.

combine that with a little Kylie of course.....

Better the devil you know,
Better the devil you know,
oohh oh ohho oh ohho oh oh oh oh...

and you have a session of radiotherapy!

I've been a bit sleepy the last couple of days. I have been over-sleeping and yesterday didn't have chance to tame my sticking up short hair. I was so embarrassed when I went into my Radiotherapy session that I had to explain to the 3 nurses (male and female) why my hair was such a mess... then I realised the bizarreness of being embarrassed about how my hair looked when I was standing there topless -It's just become second nature these days to get looked at, prodded and poked that I don't think twice about that!

It's like buses....

you wait for a while and then 3 posts come along at once!

I had a medical review appointment at yesterday's radiotherapy session. I had built this up thinking it would be a check-over of my radiotherapy area (which I could use to get a couple of worries off my chest about a few pains and things). I also thought I would sort out my hormonal treatments to start after radiotherapy. Obviously the doc just had a quick glance at me, nothing more and couldn't really tell me anything about the next part of my treatment.

I have realised I am really not good when plans change and it can really throw me off course and cause the leaking eyes if I don't get the answers and discussions I was expecting to cover. I can deal with the big ole' things but give me a different doctor to the one I was expecting and that can trigger me off for a start.

So I am again a bit unsure about what the next stage is. My oncologist suggested Tamoxifen and Zoladex as I have mentioned. However yesterdays Doc threw in the fact that "it is debatable about whether hormonal therapies will provide any benefit" and that "If I was going to be given Zoladex to put me into the menopause I should have Arimidex which is more effective than Tamoxifen".
Hmmmmm I like to be involved in the decisions that get made about my treatment and take an active part to understand the options.... so now I am a bit unsure of the best course of action. Better get another appointment with my oncologist sorted to discuss it.
My general feelings about the "debatable" issue are to consider how I would feel in 2 years time if it came back and was shown to be responding to hormones and I hadn't taken any hormonal therapies..... I would feel a bit stupid then wouldn't I!

It's not like I can ask all my 'Breast Buddies' as every single young girl I have come across seems to be having totally different treatments. So I have blatently used my blog here to get it all off my chest - what a wonderful invention a blog can be.

Catching the sun.

Well, things are still going along well. I am feeling very bright today (is it related to the fact that it is sunny outside???) and I even felt up to attempting a little housework this morning! sssh don't tell James I am feeling that well.
I was very sleepy over the weekend and also needed James to take me for yesterday's session, tiredness must just come and go.

My skin is doing really well with no itching or discomfort. The red patch so far can be described as "just caught the sun" as opposed to "sun burn". Only 3 more full-boob zapping sessions with the X-rays until I switch to "Boosters" which means bombarding the scar area with electrons apparently.

Anyway, interesting fact for the day [which I have just heard on Steve Wright in the afternoon but actually appears to also be scientific fact(in Norway at least)] that cancer prognosis has been shown to be related to the season of diagnosis!?! Patients diagnosed in the summer having better outcomes than those in the winter. Well I never. I was diagnosed autumn time going onto winter, however, as I found the lump in Australia where it was summer and very sunny I am classing myself as a summer-diagnosee!!! I think they are suggesting it is related to Vitamin D levels at time of diagnosis and treatment or something or other. Guess I better get out in the garden and mop up some rays just to make sure! :D

No cheese today.

Today I didn't have any cheese to bop along to... it was one of those modern bands playing a song the likes of which you would hear on Radio One! I don't like it!

Yesterday however, Rick Astley with Together Forever (I've already experienced "Never gonna give you up" the other day)... so lets hear it.....together forever and never to part... together forever we two... and don't you know I would move heaven and earth... to be together forever with yoooouuuuuu!

I think my Radiotherapy is being sponsored by Stock, Aitken and Waterman!

Especially for you.

The cheese continues.... Kylie and Jason followed by Rick Astley today. I'm loving it!

This means I am now half way through the radiotherapy. The treatment has so far given me a definite square patch of red skin where I am being treated and a little bit of tiredness to go with it.

Can't touch this!

well, I have had a lovely few days. I am actually enjoying the routine of getting out and doing something every day.

I spent the first two nights of this week away from home. I stayed with some friends who live close to the hospital. I told myself that this would cut down on tiring driving to-and-fro every day, but really I wanted to see my friends and spend some time with them. And I have definitely done that over the last few days! Hello to Sarah (one of my breast friends); Moira; Marie and Josie; Sarah C, Jim and Sarah M; Ruth and Stu!
Plus I have fitted in a hand and foot massage and a session of reflexology.... all around a few strategic afternoon power naps!

phew!

As for the Radiotherapy, it is going well. My skin is starting to take on a slight sun-kissed look, but it is hardly noticeable - I needed the nurse to point it out to me. The sessions themselves are so quick and are still being accompanied by cheesy music (I am learning self control to not sing along).

Mondays Music: Mc Hammer - Can't touch this
Tuesdays Music: Unknown Cheese
Wednesdays Music: Kylie again "What do I have to do"

oooh, the anticipation over what will be playing later today ;-D

1 week down, just 3 to go!

Yay, I've finished my first week of Rads.
Doing just fine :-D

Although the side effects are not suppose to set in until the second week I am feeling a little tight in the area and feel like I have a ping pong ball in my armpit at times... the nurse said this could be the effects of the rads on scar tissue from the op that removed my lymph nodes from there.... but equally it could just be me imagining it and waiting for something to happen.

The week has gone well and I am getting into the routine. James has driven me for some, I've driven myself for some, I've stayed at a friends near the hospital for some - so its just flown. I've also been really shattered at times this week, I don't yet think this is a side effect of the radiotherapy but more that I haven't picked up energy-wise since the end of chemo. Apart from that I am having to apply emollient cream to the treatment area morning and night. I now have the most supremely moisturised right breast!

The treatments themselves are uneventful. Apart from one day where we had an hours waiting around I have been straight in-and-out. The most eventful thing to the treatments so far has been today when I had to suppress a fit of giggles to stay perfectly still during my treatment. The nurses played Kylie Minogue "I Should Be So Lucky" into the room. I tell you - how are you supposed to stay still when the desire to sing along is soooo strong and I told the nurses so... I wasn't the first to say that today so cue the need to hold back the giggles to stay perfectly aligned. I think they have done it on purpose. At least now I know how long it takes to get zapped - The whole duration of Kylie's "I Should Be So Lucky" and the first half of Mel and Kim's Respectable!

So that's my week really!

...and so the next phase begins.

Today I have had my first Radiotherapy zapping. It all went swimmingly and has left no obvious side effects that I am aware of :) I am so pleased to be starting the next phase of my treatment. It simply involves walking into the room, whipping my top off and jumping up on the table. They then fiddle around for a minute lining me up by my tattoos and then buzzzzzz and it's done.

I am to have all my appointments around midday which means I can get myself into a nice little routine, avoiding traffic and avoiding temptation to do too many other things that might tire me out. With the appointments being around midday I might even have to think about sorting out a nice little picnic and flask of tea to be taking in with me every day :)

The hair growth continues.....

For those who are interested in following the hair growth here is a photo taken last night (I went out to the pub for a couple of hours, Yay). I took the plunge and went au-natural. I also cut James' hair last week with the clippers so I nearly have hair longer than my husbands (oh, the temptation to put the wrong clipper attatchment on and speed up the process of getting longer hair than my hubby was so strong). But step-by-step I will get closer to normality and the "old" me.

I'm back.

I am back at home now... and have to confess I am still in bed (it is 1:30 in the afternoon!).

I have had a nice break away and I have done quite a few nice things this week. I did try to tell myself I needed to rest in readiness for Radiotherapy - but I will never listen (and would do it the same all over again ;-D). Just give me back a little energy and I grab it with both hands. So today I have taken the pace down significantly and plan to just rest over the weekend.

I have been missed by all while I was away and so it is nice to come home to lots of attention and cuddles. How the cats will cope when I go back to work I don't know!

So, I start the Radiotherapy on Monday and I am putting aside July as just "Radiotherapy" month. Bring it on.